Tuesday greetings to you, My Friend!
Question for you: Did you ever make an assumption about someone before you knew them, and it turned out to be totally wrong? Please say yes. Please say I’m not the only one that does this. I want to tell you a story about a time I did just that and the hilarious outcome. As it happens, this experience occurred just about eight years ago, but it feels like yesterday.
So, first of all, let me tell you that my darling husband loves to invite people to stay at our house if they’re in town. Family? Friends? Of course! But I’m talking about his business associates. Hotel? No! We’ve got room! Oh, that sweet extrovert of mine. He’s got the gift of hospitality. The problem is—I don’t. And I’m an introvert, to boot. And I’m the one who’s home a lot and deals with these extemporaneous persons.
My hospitable, extroverted hubby had a business colleague coming to town for a work thing. And he wasn’t coming here alone, he was bringing his wife. Now, having a guy come over is one thing. Adding his wife to the picture is another level of cleaning that needs to be done. To make matters “worse,” this guest was a very successful dentist from somewhere out west, and I imagined him to be not just fancy but fancy schmancy. Come on, you know what I mean. And if he was fancy schmancy, his wife would undoubtedly be ultra-fancy. How on earth was I going to deal with this? My bathrooms were so outdated they were practically back in style again.
To make a long story a bit shorter, as it turned out, Mrs. Ultra-Fancy turned out to be really sweet, and we actually got along very well. Some people you click with, if you know what I mean. We clicked. (Thank You, Lord.)
While Kevin took the good doctor to work one day, I decided to take Kim (her actual name) out for lunch. One place that’s fun to bring visitors to is Palm Beach. Of course, there’s the gorgeous Atlantic Ocean to drive past and the mansions. And, naturally, a stroll down Worth Avenue, where I could never buy anything, but, hey, window shopping is free! I made a reservation for us to have lunch at the iconic “Taboo” restaurant.
As we strolled down the street toward the restaurant, enjoying a beautiful South Florida sunny day, I resisted the urge to call out to passersby. “Hi, Phyllis! How’re the kids?” “Ben! I see you’re down for the winter!” “Hey there, Lydia! I love your shoes!” As though I’d really know any of the people on the streets of Worth Avenue. Gosh, I love pretending.
And then—it happened.
“Hey there, ladies! I have something for you!” A young woman called out from the doorway of one of the shops. No, no, no, I know this routine. She’s going to say something nice about us and try to give us something, and the next thing you know, we’ll be caught in her snare. I tried to get by without going so far as grabbing Kim’s elbow and leading her straight ahead. But that darn Kim! She was so nice! So kind! She stopped. She turned toward the young temptress. Nooooooo, she was greeting her back and outstretching her hand to receive the poison apple—I mean—cosmetic sample!! I didn’t know her quite well enough to say, “Kim! Don’t be an idiot! Get away from her!!”
The next thing I knew, the fresh-faced thing had us in the shop and sitting atop high stools. Kim and I sat side by side, and the young gal faced us. Suddenly, I felt like I was in the principal’s office of my elementary school and was about to get a good talking to. Dear God, make it stop!
The first thing she asked us was to look at each other and “tell your friend which side of her face is the ‘worst.'” OK, you want me to look at this woman I met yesterday whose husband is working in some capacity with my husband right now and tell you what side of her face is the ugliest? I’ll pass. But somehow, we determined which side of our faces needed the most help. And wouldn’t you know, this young woman had just what we needed to help. Problem being—it was $1,400.00 a pop. (But wait, I’ll tell you about the “sale” it was on in a minute.) As she applied some magical serum to the left side of my face and the right side of Kim’s, she inquired if we both smoked or if we just drank through straws a lot. Hmmm, I’m guessing she saw lines around our mouths that were a disgrace to the likes of Worth Avenue.
It’s possible this young woman was a doctor herself because she told us that, unfortunately, our bodies no longer rejuvenated themselves due to our advanced age, but she was here to help. She applied her products and asked, “Can I ask you something? Why have you never done anything about . . . ” Here, she just trailed off but made a circular motion with her finger in front of my face. When I told her I never thought about it, that I was OK with how I looked, she raised her eyebrows and seemed at a loss for words.
So, I told you how much this miracle treatment would cost, but the good news was it was on sale! “Today, it’s only six ninety-nine!” she informed us proudly.
“Wow, Kim!” I smiled as I replied. “Can you believe it? It’s only $6.99!” I knew full well it was $699.00, but I’d just about had enough of Young Missy. Young Missy did not find my quip humorous, and time was a-wasting (like our poor shriveled faces), so I told the young lady we needed to leave, that we had a lunch reservation. I grabbed Kim by the arm and pulled her out of that shop and on to our lunch. We laughed the whole way down the street.
The funny thing is, that cream really did work! It was like we both had mini-facelifts on one side of our faces. The downside was we couldn’t feel our faces for about five hours afterward!
That was eight years ago. I have seen Kim only a couple of other times since then, and we always recall our time in the chairs of that skincare shop.
That experience taught me I didn’t need to pretend to be someone else. I had this idea that Kim would be a certain way, and I’d need to be a certain way for us to get along. She would be fancy, and I’d need to be fancy as well. I was wrong on both counts. She was herself, and I was “me,” and we got along great! I know not every relationship we encounter will end up so well, but isn’t it easier to just be who we are? I don’t do this right all the time, I admit, but I think I’m getting better.
I came across a quote just his morning that sums this up well. It’s from a book called The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. “If you aim to be something you are not, you always fail. Aim to be you. Aim to look and act and think like you. Aim to be the truest version of you. Embrace the you-ness. Endorse it. Love it. Work hard at it. And don’t give a second thought when people mock it or ridicule it. Most gossip is envy in disguise.”
I hope you embrace your unique “you-ness” this week! Even if your body is in need of rejuvenation, like mine!
I’ll be taking the next two weeks “off” from writing as my family will be around. I’ll be back on December 9! Wishing you a very Happy Thanksgiving!
Written with love – – – Patti XOXO